All the lies were meeting at the annual Lie Summit. Well, not exactly all the lies, but given the nature of the event, the organizer could not possibly admit this detail.
Some excused themselves, though rather unconvincingly. Naturally so, because the best excuses were not available, wanting to participate at the summit.

As usual it was held in Sucksess City, rather new and of exquisite architectural blandness.
They came in all shape and sizes. Small white lies, fighting an inferior complex-attack when seeing the more substantial ones.
“See how big they are?” the tiny ones would whisper “They made it for life.”

A group of Halftruths, all herded together near the buffet was trying to attract attention.
“Look at these poor things, let’s go over and chat with them” Some-Of-My-Best-Friends-Are-Jews said.

“No” replied Of-course-I-Still-Find-You-Attractive-I’m-Just-Tired
“I cannot stand these Half-and-Halfs!”
“You’re such a snob!” I-Did-Not-Have-Plastic-Surgery laughed, nibbling on candied vanities.

To-Be-Completely-Honest-With-You had elbowed its way between them: “Over there I-Never-had-Sexual-Relations-With is giving autographs. Still looking hot, these new moral fillers are doing wonders”.

“Shhh, quiet, the winner is being announced!”

“…..and after thoroughly evaluating all candidates, this year the Unnobel goes to a formidable push-up bra for self-esteem. It simply cannot be valued high enough, especially in our times of facebooking:

“I-Really-Don’t-Care-What-Others-Say”

“So they had to drag this old bone out of the closet again, didn’t they find any other candidate?” I-Forgot-My-Mobile-Phone-At-Home groaned.
“You are just jealous!” Look-At-This-Mess-I-Did-Not-Vote-For…As-Pesident hissed.
“And who are you?” Phony growled “You have not even been spoken yet! Go un-like yourself!”

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